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The Becker Sports Report
"Hilarious sports satire. Trust me."
Greg Corvi
used-car salesman

March 2007

August 2006
Warriors' GM St. Jean, alarmed by team's progress, promises return to familiar ineptitude.

Walnut Creek, CA--Golden State Warriors' GM Gary St. Jean, troubled by the Warriors' progress last season, is intent on returning the team to its familiar, comfortable ineptitude, he told reporters at a Walnut Creek Golf event.

To that end, St. Jean said he was looking for ways to terminate the team's relationship with head coach Eric Musselman, who presided over the team's resurgence, and sever ties with promising guard Gilbert Arenas, who threatens to give the Warriors a credible presence in the backcourt for years to come.

"Eric's gotta go," St. Jean said. "He's flat-out getting the job done, way too soon, and that's just not acceptable."

Arenas, he said, "did a great job for us last year, and that's the problem. We're looking at sticking [Bob] Sura back at the point."

Sura, St. Jean stresses, "gives us the poor decision-making on a consistent basis that pretty much ensures we're not going anywhere."

St. Jean reminded reporters that he loves the challenge of keeping the team "bad" year after year. He also apologized for last year's aberration, when the team showed signs of development.

"I'm taking care of this right now," he said. "Guaranteed."

"That's it, fellas," he finished, emitting a thick cloud of blue cigar smoke. "Now get lost."




Copyright (c) 2005 by Steve Becker.All rights reserved.

 
 
 

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